We are all born with a specific love relationship pattern and our unique relationship DNA can be seen in the natal chart. Relationship astrology can tell us a great deal about our attitudes towards relationships and the type of connections we attract. We can also discover significant chemistry between two people, just by looking at their synastry chart.
For example, when we are looking for sexual chemistry we examine cross aspects between the planets, Venus and Mars. Some couples say that they had an immediate attraction to one another when they first met, and couldn’t keep their hands off each other. On the other hand, other couples say there has always been something missing in their attraction. It’s our natal planets connected to someone else’s planets which create this chemical reaction.
Elemental compatibility is also important when assessing the synastry/chemistry between a couple. We examine the overriding basic material of a person through the dominant element and we also look for what is missing. According to psychology astrology, we tend to fill in those gaps with our choice of partner. Chemistry is the most powerful component in a relationship because it provides the initial spark when we click.
Here is the standard dictionary definition of Chemistry:
1. The interaction of one personality with another
2. Sympathetic understanding: rapport
3. Any and all of the elements that make up something.
Without the aid of astrology, it can otherwise be difficult to articulate why we click with a person. We might say, they share the same sense of humor, or we have similar values, etc. In addition, sometimes certain people tend to bring out the “worst aspects” in our personality. In such cases, perhaps the partner plugs into our shadow planets – Saturn and Pluto. Maybe our significant other is too Neptune for us and we keep falling under their illusive, deceptive, and enchanting spell. But it’s through our engagement with this individual that we learn more about ourselves in the process and achieve some of our greatest growth.
I understand why most people feel overwhelmed trying to piece all of these pieces together in a synastry chart reading. The sheer amount of information that can be gleaned from both charts can be daunting. However, even just knowing someone’s Sun Sign can begin to tell us a great deal about how that person will function in a relationship. Many people ask others about the sign of a lover, and it may seem superficial, considering the depth of astrology. Still, it’s the first piece of information we want to know about a prospective lover. Also, don’t be frightened away by hard aspects, sometimes we might have someone with planets challenging our Sun, which is symbolic of our sense of self, and feel that the other is trying to change us. However, relationships like these ones help us to develop our core individuality; they generate energy and we quickly discover who we don’t want to be, very quickly.
Furthermore, astrology is a great tool for helping us understand others, but we also have to be careful that we don’t over-analyze our relationships and get ourselves tied up in knots over heavy conjunctions, squares, and oppositions in our synastry chart. There are many successful relationships with these kinds of interactions, and sometimes the relationship is more effective. Astrologer Liz Greene believes that relationships are our fate because they reflect back to us our own character and that we fall in love with ourselves through others; because we are seeking to develop a relationship which is incomplete within ourselves. Besides, when approaching love astrology doesn’t get over technical, there is always something that cannot be explained, a mysterious entity that hides behind the essence of any relationship.
Nothing strips us so naked. Nothing is quicker to reveal the angel we hide behind our eyes, and nothing is so quick to unmask our private madnesses. Who has not been lifted high by love? Who has not felt the world change in a moment of secret tenderness? And who has not been ripped open by love and left bleeding and alone, wide-eyed at four in the morning? People speak of “fear of intimacy” as if it were some kind of modern disease. That’s lunacy. We never met anyone with enough brains to fill a teaspoon who didn’t fear intimacy. It’s dangerous. It’s an awesome force. Once we have been around love’s mulberry bush a few times, we learn that – and usually have some scars to prove it. Skymates: Love, Sex and Evolutionary Astrology